Tuesday 27 October 2009

favourite arcade.

im so sick of being melodramatic.
so im going to write this with no stupid lyrics, no stupid metaphors, just like it is.

i've been seeing my "boyfriend" on and off for like a year and a bit..
yet we've only been offical for not even a month.
and in this month, i have seen him like...three times?!
all three times i have went to him.
in this month, he has stood me up like.. three times.
so he's stood me up the same amount of times i've seen him.

what i'd like to know is, what have i actually got out of this month?
i've got collectively like seven hours of happiness with him.
he doesn't text me unless we're making plans, so i haven't had those little awesome times either when you get a text that makes you smile and you feel loved, nope, haven't had that.
thinking about it, he doesn't even text me when we ARE making plans.

the bottom line is.. i can't see other people, and i can't see him either? im basically single, but not allowed to see anyone.

self esteem is like this much *holds thumb and finger apart*

it's not that we don't have a great time when we're together, and i do love him, but i'm starting to wonder if this is the right thing.

personally i think people should have equal amounts of respect for each other, take turns in visiting each other, and WANT to see each other, in a relationship. clearly, i have none of these things.

i just want him to show me he loves me. right now he's just another guy.

3 comments:

Alga Coho said...

if you want an outside opinion.. surely for a relationship to work it has to be what you both want and to establish that you need to talk to each other about what you want, so if you want something he's not giving you you need to talk to him? thats what id do, but afterall i am a guy so i dont know very much on relationships. :)

DariFace said...

thanks dude. i tried to do that yesterday, i rang him like and he didn't answer and i just thought what the fuck am i doing.. so i wanna get things sorted, but i don't wanna lose face by getting in contact with him, if you know what i mean. sheesh fml haha

Alga Coho said...

ah jeez :/. but remember if it needs to be done, if needs to be done. i know its cliched but everything works out for the best in the end. and good luck i hope everything works out for you :)