Day Four.

today, i finally bought that onesie that i thought might be a waste of money, then embraced my momma and bro laughing at me :)
i also went out of my way to tell this awesome girl how kickass her outfit was and she laughed and said she thought i'd seen her looking at my boots, which she liked. i like random conversations with people. anyway there's a picture with my original onesie when i was only little.

Day Three.

today i started really noticing boys again.
it's been a long time since i've been single and liked someone.
today he was walking past the car i was driving and i stalled and couldn't get it back on. fml. at least i'm making steps in the right direction.

on the plus side i finished my nightmare before christmas picture.

Day Two.

This is a page from my diary.
No one has ever read a word.
I'm glad to share this with You.
The first person except me.

You. are. Amazing!

Day One.

Today, myself and my friends' ex-boyfriend decided we need to help her seriously with her drinking as she got picked up by the police last night....

I wouldn't have done this without his support, we just care about her too much. Actually i've let her behaviour slide for a long time, putting it down to reboundness. But now i'm seriously concerned for her health.. it's pretty horrible. I'm pushing myself to confront her, something I wouldn't have done before.

This isn't the brightest thing to start off my ONE THING A DAY. But unfortunately it's the thing that has been on my mind all day.

I also dressed up as a princess and took photos for art. But that's nothing new :)

You. Are. Beautiful.

Close your.. Brown eyes.. (ONE THING A DAY)

I'm quite predictable really.
so this is what i'm gonna do.
i'm going to make a promise to do something different every day.

something that scares me, or that i wouldn't usually do.

something unlike me.

i'll blog about it i guess.

meooooooowwwwwww :)

what time is it? prom time.

eugh. prom.
everyone won't shut up about it. like seriously. where are you sitting? did you get your dress? who are you bringing? WHO CARES it's like two months away! and although this is all very annoying i'm getting tired of telling people i'm not going. i think they think i don't have a date.

i do, i have four people wanting to go but i promised myself that if i went to prom again it would be with my boyfriend. he didn't get to go to my last and i've been waiting. but we broke up. typical. fuck prom.

Today i...

a friend grabbing me in the morning for a hug, the tears in her eyes mirroring my own sorrow.
"inspiration is more important than sleep" being scrawled on my notebook.
i failed to comfort others alot today. big eyes brimmed with sadness.
weekend plans being selfishly made.
a step to nudge another.
not thinking.
life choices undecided.
a plan on paper.
an attempt to sleep, a message.
beautiful in madness, we finish.
perfect moments gone.
today is finally fucking over.
i hope i get some sleep.

New Blood

New Blood pumping beside me.
Coursing through heart and lips.
Heat flaring with fleeting whispers.
Begging me to go further.

Happiness is Disney

you have a baby but you are a baby.

ok so another blogger just pointed out that my posts are miserable.
and i kinda have to agree.
jeez like i'm a really happy person, i have really everything i could want, good friends who support me, an amazing family, more attention than i really want and a pretty decent social life :)

i have no reason to be sad! so i picked this as a visual representation of how i feel, meow :)

plus my cousin was just here and she had a kid like last week and we talked about it all night with some wine, sweeet!

effort.

i'm not going to ask him to talk, or explain, or change.
because i'm so ...exhausted... trying to get through to someone who doesn't want gotten through to.
who think's they're always right.
who doesn't listen.

i didn't understand when my boyfriend started telling me all these things.
i "can't" understand.
i have theories. none he would acknowledge.

i feel like i'm not part of something anymore.
i make the effort and talk to him, getting tiny amounts back.
pointless. and empty.

Winter Please?

big coats, pretty snow, romantic dark nights, hot chocolate, sleepyness. make me happy.

"i love everything about you"

-"you already know how i feel, i've said"
-"..said what?"
-whispers. "i love you"
-"....i love you too"

the first time. 25.09.09

lies to yourself

If I could listen, you'd dedicate many a song.
If we were still beautiful, a kiss of perfection would be our calling card.
If our hearts rang out with anything but lust, I'd hold yours so close to mine.
If my touch made your skin tingle, any doubts would perish.
If your voice was still sweet, I'd sew every word, and wear my heart on my sleeve once more.
If my hand could guide you, I'd bring you to the ocean.
I'd reach inside, and rip everything disgusting from our bodies.
Let them float away.