Monday, 9 November 2009

eugh. choices suck out my life.

(8) Will you meet me halfway? (8)

Today i realised that you cannot keep control of everything, all the time, no matter how hard you try.

I cannot control the people who have some kind of a superiority complex.
I cannot control the fact that i am no longer the smartest person..
I can't help that i feel i'm growing apart from people, so fast that it's hard to remember who exactly i'm growing apart from...
I can't make my teacher tell me what to do, fuck it, she doesn't even know.
I can't control the way i feel this very moment.

I can't control my urge to throw everything away, to start over once again.
And follow my heart, rather that these stupid, stupid rational thoughts.

I want to be happy again, i hate that this school is making me change as a person. I have to do something.

xx

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